that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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