shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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