my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
