Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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