low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Randomize