the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
