There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
