I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
