so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
That's when you crack a 10am beer
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
