Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
