wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
