i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
