So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize