He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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