I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
