you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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