question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
