She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
