The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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