But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize
