Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
