Cold hands, warm shart.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
