I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
