based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
high people should be assigned attendants
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
