What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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