I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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