dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I think I just sharted jello shots
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
