what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
