It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize