No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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