were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
zippers are such a cool invention
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
