he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
