i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
