I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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