The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
