what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize