Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
