I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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