I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
