I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
