Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
vagina is talking i cant
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize