Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
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