Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
