I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
