he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
