I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
