i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
