Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
