Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
