I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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